To give up all hope of ever having a flat stomach.
What we ask for when we already know the answer but wish we hadn’t.
A high price to pay for maturity.
An invention to end all inventions.
One of the only pieces of evidence we have that people are still thinking.
Someone who is early when you are late and late when you are early.
One who is known to many persons he is glad he doesn’t know.
A book which people praise, but do not read.
Individuals who can do nothing individually, sit to decide that nothing can be done together.
The place you reach when you’re tired of thinking.
The only place where divorce comes before marriage.
Dare I Eat That.
Art of saying, ‘Nice doggie!’… till you can find a rock.
A person who tells you to go to hell in such a way that you actually look forward to the trip.
Receiving no ‘likes’ on a witty status update.
A person who kills your ills by pills, and later kills you with his bills.
One who is looking for men between the ages of 25 and 30 with 40 years of experience.
A sign to make others believe that you know more than you actually do.
That marvelous thing that enables you to recognize a mistake when you make it again.
A banker provided by nature.
A vegetable with looks and money.
Someone who will stand by you through all the troubles that you wouldn’t have had if you had stayed single.
When you care enough to send the very best but not enough to actually write something.
Heaven: American salary, British home, Chinese food, German car, Indian wife.
Hell: American wife, British food, Chinese car, German home, Indian salary.
What’s left of the lover after the nerve has been extracted.
It is in the process:
It is so wrapped up in red tape that the situation is about hopeless.
One who is paid for uploading such Posts and Articles!
Twelve persons chosen to decide who has the better lawyer.
What happens when you’re not watching TV.
First chapter in Poetry and remaining in Prose.
A very expensive way to get the laundry done.
It’s an agreement in which a man loses his bachelors degree and woman gains her masters.
When a guy gets stabbed in the back and, instead of bleeding, he sings.
One who starts taking bath if he accidentally falls into a river.
In international affairs, a period of cheating between two periods of fighting.
Somebody who complains about the noise when opportunity knocks.
One who shakes your hand before elections and your confidence after.
A fellow who asks you a lot of expensive questions your wife asks for nothing.
The next person you start talking to after you start talking to yourself.
Someone who is never late. Everyone else is simply early.
The art of turning left in a car for 4 hours.
Twice as much husband and half as much money.
News that travels more than the speed of sound.
A very fine thing especially when your parents have done it for you.
A curve that can set a lot of things straight.
The hydraulic force by which masculine will power is defeated by feminine water power.
Test results were extremely gratifying:
We are so surprised that the stupid thing works.
The entire concept will have to be abandoned:
The only person who understood the thing quit.
A last demand before resorting to concessions.
An old Indian (Native American) word meaning “lousy hunter”.
Most efficient money reducing agent known to man-kind!
An image often used by persons interested in becoming bone models.
It’s the only time when some married men ever get to open their mouth.