Jokes

Teacher: Nick, what is the past participle of the verb “to ring”?
Nick: What do you think it is, sir?
Teacher: I don’t think, I KNOW!
Nick: I don’t think I know either, Sir!
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Girl to God: Thank you for all the blessings. I will not ask for anything for myself. Just give my parents a hot son-in-law.
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Teacher: Now class, whatever I ask, I want you to all answer at once. How much is six plus 4?
Class: At once!
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Sharon: Ever had a hot kiss?
Tracy: Yes, he’d forgotten to take the cigarette out of his mouth.
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Teacher: George Washington not only chopped down his father’s cherry tree, but also admitted doing it. Now, Louis, do you know why his father didn’t punish him?
Louis: Because George still had the axe in his hand.
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I look at the stars, the stars are beautiful. I look at you..I..I..I’d rather look at the stars again!
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A recently fired stock trader: This is worse than divorce… I have lost everything and I still have my wife.
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In which sport do winners move backwards and losers move forwards?
Tug-of-war.
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What’s an ig?
A snow house without a loo.
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A teacher asked one of his boys in her class, “Can people predict the future with cards?” His response was, “My mother can.”
The teacher replied, “Really?”
The boy quickly explained, “Yes, she takes one look at my report card and tells me what will happen when my father gets home.”
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