Jokes Hindi.

Santa: Mujhe phone par dhamkiyan mil rahi hai.
Police: Kaun hai who?
Santa: BSNL wale bolte hai bill na bhara to kaat denge.
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Munna: Circuit yaar ye barish ke waqt bijli kyu chamakti hai?
Circuit: Bhai bole to upar wala torch maar ke dekhta hoega ki kahi sala Sukha to nahi reh gaya.
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Wife: Kal raat tum neend main mujhe gaaliya de rahe the.
Husband: Tumhe galat fehmi hui hai.
Wife: Kaisi galat fehmi?
Husband: Yehi ke main soya hua tha!
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Baap: Beta is bar tujhe exam me 90% lana hai.
Beta: Nahi dad, mai to is bar 100% launga.
Baap: Kya mazak kar rahe ho?
Beta: Shuru kisne kiya tha?
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Teacher: A for?
Chintu: Apple.
Teacher: Jor se bolo?
Chintu: Jay mata di.
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Sardar to doctor: Poore jism me kahin bhi ungli lagao toh bahut dard hota hai.
Doctor suggested full body Xray, when doctor checked Xray report he found fracture in ungli.
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Rahul Gandhi: Mom apki vajah se meri shadi nahi ho rahi…
Sonia Gandhi: Kyon?
Rahul: Har taraf likha hai ‘Sonia ko BAHU MAT do.’
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Sir: Bacho Kasam Khao Ki Sharab, cigarette, jua or ladkiyon ko nahin chuoge! Des ke liye jaan de doge!
Bachhe: De denge Sir, aisi jindagi jikar kya karenge.
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1000 pages ki book kitne din me padh sakte ho?
Writer: 6 months.
Doctor: 2 months.
Lawyer: 1 month.
Student: Pehle ye batao ki exam kab hai.
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Mannoo read the graffiti on the wall, ‘Padne wala gadha.’ He thought for an hour, erased it and wrote back, ‘Likhne wala gadha.’
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Doctor: Aap ka aur aapki biwi ka blood group ek hi hai?
Husband: Hoga, zarur hoga; 25 saal se mera khoon jo pee rahi hai.
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Ram – Ye phulon ki mala kyun?
Doctor – Ye mera pehla operation hai, successful hua toh mere liye, nahi to tumhare liye!
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At a cricket ground:
Guard: Match to ho gayi, ab khun baithe ho?
Santa: No problem, highlights dekhunga.
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Gullu: Tu hamesha foreign channels kyu dekhta hai?
Santa: Kuch bijli unki bhi kharch hone do!
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